Confronting Abuse In The Orthodox
Community
© (2003) by Rabbi Yosef Blau
- Reprinted by Permission -
Originally Printed in Nefesh News, 7:9, July
2003
It is no longer possible to ignore the tragic reality
that sexual, physical and emotional abuse exists within the Orthodox community.
Recent revelations about rabbis and teachers abusing adolescents, often
continuing to abuse for decades, dramatically remind us that our existing
mechanisms are failing to deal with the problem. I am not aware of any statistics
which clarify whether the numbers of offenders is substantial, but even a
small number can traumatize hundreds of victims.
The full measure of the horrendous nature of abuse
is not always apparent from a technical halakhic perspective. Two teenagers
touching each other inappropriately are guilty of the same sin as a forty-year
old rabbi touching a thirteen-year old female student. We intuitively recognize
that the rabbi has used his position as an authority figure to manipulate
a vulnerable child, though she is an adult according to halakha. A pedophile
who abuses minors, even if he gets their approval, is halakhically a rapist,
but not if he does the same with an adolescent boy or girl.
It is even more difficult to pinpoint the sin when
dealing with emotional abuse and manipulation. While one can make similar
technical arguments in other areas of halakha, its significance in this context
is its use as cover for the many who do not want to deal with the full
implications of confronting rabbinical abuse. Not wanting to see themselves
as lacking sympathy for victims, people can claim to be concerned about
preserving halakhic standards. How rare it is to have two witnesses who saw
the abuse.
Even when the pattern of abuse is clear, the question
remains how to effectively deal with the abuser in a way that at least limits
his ability to move elsewhere and continue to abuse new people. Schools fire
abusive teachers, who then move to another community and start teaching (and
abusing) in the new yeshiva. Going public is seen as causing a hilul
Hashem and going to secular authorities as mesira.
Virtually all poskim agree that if there is danger
to future victims then there is no halakhic issue of mesira, but practically
the taboo of mesira remains. Victims are discouraged from coming forward
on other grounds as well; it will potential hurt shiddukhim , not only for
the victim for members of his family as well. Compassion is expressed for
the reputations of members of the abuser's family as well. The probability
that family members may have suffered abuse themselves and continue to suffer
from being in ongoing contact with the abuser, is not understood.
Taking the accusation to a Beis Din, unfortunately,
is rarely effective. Few rabbis have any training in recognizing abuse and
rabbinical courts have no investigative arm. Some abusers are charismatic
leaders and have followers who will say whatever they ask them to say. Perjury
to a Beis Din is not punished and in many cases the witness, in support of
his mentor, has no difficulty with distorting what occurred. The cultic element
in the guru's leadership is hard for us acknowledge. A rabbi promoting Judaism
is seen as incapable of being a cult leader.
Newspapers, particularly Jewish newspapers are assumed
to be anti-Orthodox. Speaking to them is almost the act of a traitor. Yet
at the present time the media have played a primary role in the increased
awareness of this problem; an abuser whose name has appeared in the newspaper
is unlikely to be hired by a new school or youth movement.
Two recent cases point to differing approaches now
being used. In one story from Israel, a commission including a rabbi,
psychologist and a judge evaluated allegations and the accused was fired
from his teaching position. He hired a lawyer and is fighting for reinstatement.
The Israeli media have picked up the story. A recent article in Maariv
broadened the discussion to quote varying views about rabbis counseling
married women.
The other case involved allegations that been investigated
twenty years ago and a resulting agreement that an individual would leave
Jewish education, which was not effectively enforced. After two decades it
became difficult to reconstruct what had occurred. Supporters of the accused
spoke freely to the media while victims used pseudonyms. New allegations
surfaced and a major expose appeared in the papers and a new Beis Din was
formed to decide how to deal with the accusations. While no formal announcement
has been made, their apparent decision was to send the case to a religious
court in Israel that will deal with the charges.
Despite growing awareness and concern, no consensus
has yet emerged. Rabbis are not trained to recognize abuse nor given an approach
to aid them in responding when they realize that it is occurring. Principals
are not equipped to respond to accusations against teachers in their schools.
Rabbinical organizations do not have rules of appropriate conduct. Accused
abusers retain membership in these organizations without any process to remove
their names.
Our community has not been educated to recognize abuse
nor to appreciate the ongoing trauma of victims. Headlines in newspapers
are not effective educational tools. Often the response is to express anger
at the paper and then ignore the abuse. Until the mentality of the community
changes little progress will be made.
Even if a method will be developed to get rabbinical
approval for victims to go to the police, much of the problem will remain.
Not every manifestation of abuse involves criminal behavior. "Rabbis" who
seduce women as a part of outreach or marital therapy are not guilty of a
punishable offence. Proper utilization of secular authorities is a necessary
step but clearly not a total solution.
In Chicago after there were a number of serious incidents,
a special Beis Din whose members are respected across the Orthodox spectrum
was established to deal with accusations of abuse. Similar rabbinical courts
in other major cities, whose judges would be trained to recognize abuse and
would have appropriate mental health professionals as consultants, should
be introduced. Creating special rabbinical courts is a powerful statement
that a serious problem needs to be addressed.
Nefesh professionals have a critical role to play in
educating the Orthodox community, in treating and supporting victims and
in serving as consultants for schools and organizations. Only people who
are trained can lead a systematic campaign explaining the nature of abuse
and the need to confront it openly. Stigma has to be removed from victims.
When the identity of an abuser is revealed the response of far too many is
"We have known that for years." Enabling abusers to continue, covering their
crimes to protect the image of the community, contributes to innocents being
traumatized. Judith Herman in her book on trauma points out that both the
abuser and the victims turn to others for support. The victim needs action
while the abuser only asks for our silence.
It is time to stop the silence. The true hilul
Hashem is that we allow victims to continue to suffer in order to preserve
our community's image.
Rabbi
Yosef Blau is Mashgiach Ruchani of the Rabbi Isaac Elchanan
Theological Seminary
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